Finding myself feeling lonely and isolated. Family is a strange thing. My blood family no longer exists for me. I belong to a large family on the other side that a embraced me for the most part, yet it makes me even more lonely. They talk to each other, go out do things and it just makes me more isolated than ever.
I find this time of year Depressing. COLD DARK AND LONELY.
I.
Stoplights edged the licorice street with ribbon,
neon embroidering wet sidewalks. She turned
into the driveway and leaped in the dark. A blackbird
perched on the bouncing twig of a maple, heard
her whisper, “Stranger, lover, the lost days are over.
While I walk from car to door, something inward opens
like four o’clocks in rain. Earth, cold from autumn,
pulls me. I can’t breathe the same
with dirt for marrow and mist for skin,
blurring my vision, my vision’s separate self.
I stand drunk in this glitter, under the sky’s grey shelter.
The city maple, not half so bitter, hurls itself
in two directions, until both tips darken and disappear,
as I darken my reflection in the smoking mirror
of my home. How faint the sound of dry leaves,
like the clattering keys of another morning, another world.”
Leap In The Dark
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